With the release of my latest book, Novel Concept, I had the urge to explain myself, I mean, examine the creative process and how this story came to be (see Part 1) Writing a book was not on my bucket list. I was going to write MOVIES! Or SKETCHES for TV!!! That was it. Not a TV series, no prose, articles or matchbook covers. All through college and post-graduation, my attention was drawn to the shiny movie screen and flickering TV image. There were spec scripts to mail out and sketches to hoard away (because by this time there was only one sketch-comedy show on TV and “Saturday Night Live” was a tough nut to crack)...
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The gang over at Higgs Weldon has posted one of my comedy bits over on their site. Check it out. It's like here only there. ETA: Higgs/Weldon went offline, so here's that bit: There are Third World problems and First World problems and then there are:
Disney World Problems • Line to say hello to Mickey longer than the line to the bathroom. • PETA keeps barricading “Country Bear Jamboree.” • Fast-Pass not all that fast. • Fireworks way loud. • Vendor all out of turkey drumsticks. • Got wetter on Space Mountain than I did on Splash Mountain because of the stupid kid with the soda. • Automatic toilets there cause me to forget to flush at hotel and home. • South American family of 12 cut the line ahead of us for Muppet 3-D show. • Mary Poppins is kind of stuck up. • Breakfast with the Characters consists of 3rd-tier Disney characters like Meeko, Dewey and a donkey from “Pinocchio.” • The vendor who used to sell the hot dog egg rolls? No longer there! • I heard that same joke on the Jungle Cruise the last time I was here. • Why are all the Marvel characters over at Universal Studios? • Can’t remember if I parked the RV in Goofy 5 or Minnie 7. • Pluto walking around on his hind legs not authentic to the character. • Hall of Presidents? More like Hall of Sominex! • Why are they selling autograph books so I can get the signatures of some people inside a costume? • No way should Darth Vader and Buzz Lightyear be hanging out. • Epcot? Too educational. • That guy next to me wouldn’t stop singing the “It’s a Small World” song and we were on the Spinning Teacups. • Once again forced to decide between World Hopper 5-Day Pass and children’s college fund. Okay, world, looking for a favor... I have uploaded my latest, "Novel Concept" to Kindle's new Scout program. It's much like their film production side, where the crowd gets to select what TV pilots and projects move forward, only here the winners will become a published work by Kindle Press. As it happens, I was finishing my book, and it's a stand-alone story from my other books, so, why not? Now, I need a crowd... It's a goofy, wacky tale of a writer who wants to be a best-selling writer and decides he needs to travel the world to do it. Just sans money. If any Amazon account holders could make their way to https://kindlescout.amazon.com/p/235QKTEJFACJR and nominate me, I'd appreciate it. Thank you for your time and consideration. We now return you do to our regularly scheduled program... Top 10 Party SchoolsWell, the Princeton Review released its list of top party schools and we have it here, from our home office in Princeton, NJ, the top 10 party schools...
Number 10; Degrees “R” Us Number 9; Party Favors Technical Number 8; Kegger University Number 7; Revelry Collage of Arts and Brewing Number 6; University of Merrymaking Number 5; Beer Bash U. Number 4; Universidad de Fiesta Number 3; Mimi’s Diploma and Gin Mill Number 2; Mardi Gras State And the number one party school is...Sid’s University of Part-tay
Yes, another piece, formerly posted on Associated Content. Like other Slush Pile items, I'm updating it for posting here. It sure seems former Vice President Dick Cheney has a lot to say about current events. And the conservatives have been singing his praises for it, which is weird, since truth be told, Cheney pretty much shot the Republican Party in the face and now has them apologizing to him for it (which is how it usually works with Cheney)...
Well, at least the sweet potatoes didn’t catch fire again--- Thanks for allowing all the family to come together and then leave after dessert--- We are thankful for thy bounty, although my cholesterol count probably won’t appreciate it--- And in tribute to the Pilgrims and Puritans who landed in Massachusetts, let us now burn this witch--- Who wants to stab the turkey first---? And as we honor our forefathers, who came to America from Turkey--- Let us thank you first for cancelling Aunt Margie and Uncle Ed’s flight here--- Well, Lord, thank you for this bounty, although…whole berry cranberry sauce? Really---? Let us thank the Lord and Boston Market for this meal--- |
Dan FiorellaFreelance writer, still hacking away. Archives
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